'Are you not entertained?'
That was the famous line uttered by Russell Crowe in Gladiator with his Maximus Decimus Meridius character questioning why after such a dramatic display the watching crowd gave a rather muted reaction.
There was surely nothing muted about the reactions of England and Australia fans during a febrile day one of the latest Ashes battle.
The watching masses in Perth, and on TV sets around the world, were entertained, alright. The pre-match hype lived up to and more. This was Test cricket in fast-forward, even by England's standards.
Nineteen wickets fell, including one in the opening over of England's innings and one in the first of Australia's.
Five of those 19 were taken by England captain and talisman Ben Stokes. There were five ducks, too - Australia debutant Jake Weatherald bagged one as did England's greatest batter in Joe Root - and plenty of ducking as the seamers held sway.
Australia's Mitchell Starc struck seven times on his own, England's quicks shared nine breakthroughs between them as they hit Australia with 90mph potential after 90mph potential up front and then relied on Stokes to dispatch the lower middle order and tail.
The batting was not too hot at times, with England guilty of wafty drives as well as unintelligent attacking of the short ball as they lost their final five wickets for 12 runs to be torpedoed for 172.
That aggression against the banged-in ball is something they may have to park going forward as they look to fashion scores that will keep them afloat in games, with sixes not as easily accessible as they are in England due to the Australian ground dimensions.
If they can get themselves up to par totals then what we saw in the last-session-and-a-bit on day one that they have the bowling attack - one of the fastest they have ever assembled in Australia - to frazzle a less-than-secure Baggy Greens batting line-up.
Previous England sides may have been unable to bounce back from such a shocking batting output. Not this one.
The pace of Jofra Archer, Mark Wood, Gus Atkinson and Brydon Carse rattled the home side - the wicketless Atkinson hitting Steve Smith flush on the forearm - while when a partnership was beginning to blossom between Cameron Green and Travis Head from 31-4, you had a pretty good idea who was going to break it. The captain.
Not since his maiden Test hundred at Perth in December 2013, scored at The WACA, have Australia seen the best of Stokes in Australia. He missed the 4-0 drubbing in 2017/18 after the Bristol incident and battled injury in the 4-0 drubbing in 2021/22.
But this is perhaps now peak Stokes, particularly bowling-wise, for what will surely be his last tilt at Ashes glory overseas.
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